PTIJ: Haman's bad computer
Esther 9:25
... ישוב מחשבתו הרעה
(Esther requests that Achashverush should) return (Haman's) bad computer.
What was bad about his computer? Did it not have enough RAM? Was the hard drive running slow? What technical hardware or software problems made it "bad"?
Why did Esther want a bad computer? Was she a techno-geek that she wanted to fix / upgrade it?
This question is Purim Torah and is not intended to be taken completely seriously. See the Purim Torah policy.
purim-torah-in-jest
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
add a comment |
Esther 9:25
... ישוב מחשבתו הרעה
(Esther requests that Achashverush should) return (Haman's) bad computer.
What was bad about his computer? Did it not have enough RAM? Was the hard drive running slow? What technical hardware or software problems made it "bad"?
Why did Esther want a bad computer? Was she a techno-geek that she wanted to fix / upgrade it?
This question is Purim Torah and is not intended to be taken completely seriously. See the Purim Torah policy.
purim-torah-in-jest
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
3
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
Esther 9:25
... ישוב מחשבתו הרעה
(Esther requests that Achashverush should) return (Haman's) bad computer.
What was bad about his computer? Did it not have enough RAM? Was the hard drive running slow? What technical hardware or software problems made it "bad"?
Why did Esther want a bad computer? Was she a techno-geek that she wanted to fix / upgrade it?
This question is Purim Torah and is not intended to be taken completely seriously. See the Purim Torah policy.
purim-torah-in-jest
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
Esther 9:25
... ישוב מחשבתו הרעה
(Esther requests that Achashverush should) return (Haman's) bad computer.
What was bad about his computer? Did it not have enough RAM? Was the hard drive running slow? What technical hardware or software problems made it "bad"?
Why did Esther want a bad computer? Was she a techno-geek that she wanted to fix / upgrade it?
This question is Purim Torah and is not intended to be taken completely seriously. See the Purim Torah policy.
purim-torah-in-jest
purim-torah-in-jest
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
edited 13 hours ago
Rafael
694116
694116
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
asked 15 hours ago
DanFDanF
34.9k528127
34.9k528127
3
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
3
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago
3
3
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
Haman was Mordechai's slave. A slave is responsible for mitzvos like a woman. However, Haman had a computer. It's not that his computer was broken. It's just that all computers are intrinsically bad, like the pasuk in Mishlei (כד:ח) tells us.
מְחַשֵּׁ֥ב לְהָרֵ֑עַ - A computer is for evil.
Why are they evil? Well the mishna in Pirkei Avos (ב:א) tells us.
וֶהֱוֵי מְחַשֵּׁב הֶפְסֵד מִצְוָה - And a computer causes one to lose mitzvos.
Why? Probably because they're so distracting. If you're on the computer, you will end up missing out on mitzvos.
So therefore, the whole time Haman was in possession of a computer, he was unable to do mitzvos! We know because of the rule of כל ישראל ערבים זה לזה that Esther and Haman (who both had the same חיוב in mitzvos) were responsible to make sure each other was fulfilling them. Since Haman had a computer and wasn't doing any mitzvos, Esther was responsible to get rid of it. Therefore, she asked Achasveirosh for the computer, not because it was broken so she could fix it, but rather to destroy it, so Haman could get back to doing mitzvos.
(considering all this, I should probably get off my computer now...)
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
Haman was Mordechai's slave. A slave is responsible for mitzvos like a woman. However, Haman had a computer. It's not that his computer was broken. It's just that all computers are intrinsically bad, like the pasuk in Mishlei (כד:ח) tells us.
מְחַשֵּׁ֥ב לְהָרֵ֑עַ - A computer is for evil.
Why are they evil? Well the mishna in Pirkei Avos (ב:א) tells us.
וֶהֱוֵי מְחַשֵּׁב הֶפְסֵד מִצְוָה - And a computer causes one to lose mitzvos.
Why? Probably because they're so distracting. If you're on the computer, you will end up missing out on mitzvos.
So therefore, the whole time Haman was in possession of a computer, he was unable to do mitzvos! We know because of the rule of כל ישראל ערבים זה לזה that Esther and Haman (who both had the same חיוב in mitzvos) were responsible to make sure each other was fulfilling them. Since Haman had a computer and wasn't doing any mitzvos, Esther was responsible to get rid of it. Therefore, she asked Achasveirosh for the computer, not because it was broken so she could fix it, but rather to destroy it, so Haman could get back to doing mitzvos.
(considering all this, I should probably get off my computer now...)
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
Haman was Mordechai's slave. A slave is responsible for mitzvos like a woman. However, Haman had a computer. It's not that his computer was broken. It's just that all computers are intrinsically bad, like the pasuk in Mishlei (כד:ח) tells us.
מְחַשֵּׁ֥ב לְהָרֵ֑עַ - A computer is for evil.
Why are they evil? Well the mishna in Pirkei Avos (ב:א) tells us.
וֶהֱוֵי מְחַשֵּׁב הֶפְסֵד מִצְוָה - And a computer causes one to lose mitzvos.
Why? Probably because they're so distracting. If you're on the computer, you will end up missing out on mitzvos.
So therefore, the whole time Haman was in possession of a computer, he was unable to do mitzvos! We know because of the rule of כל ישראל ערבים זה לזה that Esther and Haman (who both had the same חיוב in mitzvos) were responsible to make sure each other was fulfilling them. Since Haman had a computer and wasn't doing any mitzvos, Esther was responsible to get rid of it. Therefore, she asked Achasveirosh for the computer, not because it was broken so she could fix it, but rather to destroy it, so Haman could get back to doing mitzvos.
(considering all this, I should probably get off my computer now...)
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
Haman was Mordechai's slave. A slave is responsible for mitzvos like a woman. However, Haman had a computer. It's not that his computer was broken. It's just that all computers are intrinsically bad, like the pasuk in Mishlei (כד:ח) tells us.
מְחַשֵּׁ֥ב לְהָרֵ֑עַ - A computer is for evil.
Why are they evil? Well the mishna in Pirkei Avos (ב:א) tells us.
וֶהֱוֵי מְחַשֵּׁב הֶפְסֵד מִצְוָה - And a computer causes one to lose mitzvos.
Why? Probably because they're so distracting. If you're on the computer, you will end up missing out on mitzvos.
So therefore, the whole time Haman was in possession of a computer, he was unable to do mitzvos! We know because of the rule of כל ישראל ערבים זה לזה that Esther and Haman (who both had the same חיוב in mitzvos) were responsible to make sure each other was fulfilling them. Since Haman had a computer and wasn't doing any mitzvos, Esther was responsible to get rid of it. Therefore, she asked Achasveirosh for the computer, not because it was broken so she could fix it, but rather to destroy it, so Haman could get back to doing mitzvos.
(considering all this, I should probably get off my computer now...)
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
Haman was Mordechai's slave. A slave is responsible for mitzvos like a woman. However, Haman had a computer. It's not that his computer was broken. It's just that all computers are intrinsically bad, like the pasuk in Mishlei (כד:ח) tells us.
מְחַשֵּׁ֥ב לְהָרֵ֑עַ - A computer is for evil.
Why are they evil? Well the mishna in Pirkei Avos (ב:א) tells us.
וֶהֱוֵי מְחַשֵּׁב הֶפְסֵד מִצְוָה - And a computer causes one to lose mitzvos.
Why? Probably because they're so distracting. If you're on the computer, you will end up missing out on mitzvos.
So therefore, the whole time Haman was in possession of a computer, he was unable to do mitzvos! We know because of the rule of כל ישראל ערבים זה לזה that Esther and Haman (who both had the same חיוב in mitzvos) were responsible to make sure each other was fulfilling them. Since Haman had a computer and wasn't doing any mitzvos, Esther was responsible to get rid of it. Therefore, she asked Achasveirosh for the computer, not because it was broken so she could fix it, but rather to destroy it, so Haman could get back to doing mitzvos.
(considering all this, I should probably get off my computer now...)
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
answered 13 hours ago
RafaelRafael
694116
694116
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
1
1
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/100243
– DonielF
13 hours ago
add a comment |
3
Clearly it's because it kept killing wizards, lying, and sending POST and PUT requests.
– DonielF
13 hours ago
@DonielF I had a feeling that someone would make a reference to at least my question. I had another suspicion that it would be you. C'mon, surely, you can extract ideas from those and compose an answer? OK, I'll give you a break b/c you're preparing for Shabbat.
– DanF
13 hours ago