What to do after I signed a blank sheet of paper given to me by my manager?












65















I work as a teacher in a kindergarten for almost two years now.



Last week, my manager called me to sign a warning letter about a small issue that is not my fault and not part of my job description. I refused to sign and my manager told me to discuss this the next day. The next day, I met my manager and after some discussion she told me "do not worry it is not a big deal, just sign this paper and I will write the warning paragraph later".



I have signed a completely white paper - not even a warning form; it is a completely blank piece of paper! Yes, this is the most idiotic and stupid act that anyone could do. I have now realised how dangerous what I did is. I don't know what I should do now?



My manager is not an ethical person; she has a high desire to feel important. She always wants to feel that all teachers are following her orders. I do not know what she is planning to do with this or if she is really planning to do something bad with it.



Shall I speak to HR about this case although I do not have any evidence?










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  • 49





    Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

    – Xander
    21 hours ago






  • 24





    This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

    – rkeet
    21 hours ago






  • 11





    Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

    – usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
    16 hours ago








  • 2





    Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

    – henning
    16 hours ago






  • 4





    So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

    – DonQuiKong
    14 hours ago
















65















I work as a teacher in a kindergarten for almost two years now.



Last week, my manager called me to sign a warning letter about a small issue that is not my fault and not part of my job description. I refused to sign and my manager told me to discuss this the next day. The next day, I met my manager and after some discussion she told me "do not worry it is not a big deal, just sign this paper and I will write the warning paragraph later".



I have signed a completely white paper - not even a warning form; it is a completely blank piece of paper! Yes, this is the most idiotic and stupid act that anyone could do. I have now realised how dangerous what I did is. I don't know what I should do now?



My manager is not an ethical person; she has a high desire to feel important. She always wants to feel that all teachers are following her orders. I do not know what she is planning to do with this or if she is really planning to do something bad with it.



Shall I speak to HR about this case although I do not have any evidence?










share|improve this question









New contributor




Suzan is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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  • 49





    Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

    – Xander
    21 hours ago






  • 24





    This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

    – rkeet
    21 hours ago






  • 11





    Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

    – usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
    16 hours ago








  • 2





    Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

    – henning
    16 hours ago






  • 4





    So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

    – DonQuiKong
    14 hours ago














65












65








65


6






I work as a teacher in a kindergarten for almost two years now.



Last week, my manager called me to sign a warning letter about a small issue that is not my fault and not part of my job description. I refused to sign and my manager told me to discuss this the next day. The next day, I met my manager and after some discussion she told me "do not worry it is not a big deal, just sign this paper and I will write the warning paragraph later".



I have signed a completely white paper - not even a warning form; it is a completely blank piece of paper! Yes, this is the most idiotic and stupid act that anyone could do. I have now realised how dangerous what I did is. I don't know what I should do now?



My manager is not an ethical person; she has a high desire to feel important. She always wants to feel that all teachers are following her orders. I do not know what she is planning to do with this or if she is really planning to do something bad with it.



Shall I speak to HR about this case although I do not have any evidence?










share|improve this question









New contributor




Suzan is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.












I work as a teacher in a kindergarten for almost two years now.



Last week, my manager called me to sign a warning letter about a small issue that is not my fault and not part of my job description. I refused to sign and my manager told me to discuss this the next day. The next day, I met my manager and after some discussion she told me "do not worry it is not a big deal, just sign this paper and I will write the warning paragraph later".



I have signed a completely white paper - not even a warning form; it is a completely blank piece of paper! Yes, this is the most idiotic and stupid act that anyone could do. I have now realised how dangerous what I did is. I don't know what I should do now?



My manager is not an ethical person; she has a high desire to feel important. She always wants to feel that all teachers are following her orders. I do not know what she is planning to do with this or if she is really planning to do something bad with it.



Shall I speak to HR about this case although I do not have any evidence?







human-resources unprofessional-behavior






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edited 1 hour ago









zworek

31




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asked 22 hours ago









SuzanSuzan

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  • 49





    Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

    – Xander
    21 hours ago






  • 24





    This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

    – rkeet
    21 hours ago






  • 11





    Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

    – usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
    16 hours ago








  • 2





    Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

    – henning
    16 hours ago






  • 4





    So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

    – DonQuiKong
    14 hours ago














  • 49





    Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

    – Xander
    21 hours ago






  • 24





    This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

    – rkeet
    21 hours ago






  • 11





    Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

    – usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
    16 hours ago








  • 2





    Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

    – henning
    16 hours ago






  • 4





    So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

    – DonQuiKong
    14 hours ago








49




49





Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

– Xander
21 hours ago





Just out of curiosity, why did you sign it? Did she threaten you? Did you feel like your job was on the line?

– Xander
21 hours ago




24




24





This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

– rkeet
21 hours ago





This is the way Nigerian princes get their money... You transfer some money with the empty promise that you'll receive more.

– rkeet
21 hours ago




11




11





Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

– usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
16 hours ago







Comment/reminder: situations like this often occurs in countries with strict labour regulation by means of unethical employer in order to bypass the laws. The employee is demanded to sign blank paper that will be later printed into a post-dated resignation letter, just in case law forbids (or makes it expensive) to fire the employee. A sad example is the one of women once they disclose to be pregnant.

– usr-local-ΕΨΗΕΛΩΝ
16 hours ago






2




2





Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

– henning
16 hours ago





Get the paper back from HR, but don't expect their help. They are nor your friends.

– henning
16 hours ago




4




4





So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

– DonQuiKong
14 hours ago





So when should we deliver your new washing machine and will you be paying cash?

– DonQuiKong
14 hours ago










9 Answers
9






active

oldest

votes


















111














Yes you are in danger.



However, anything your manager does (like printing a new letter over the signature) is fraud, and quite the bad variety too.



As she was doing what she was doing in the capacity of your manager, this is now the problem of your school/company/district or whatever the organisation is where you work.



HR is not your friend but in this case they will (or at least should) be your ally. To be a bit safer you could make it sound like you are just asking a question ("(describe in detail what happened), hey what was this about?", that way you get both documentation and can stay on polite footing with HR. I'd reccommend dropping by the office after the email too (if that is not too weird for a teacher in your district/area) just to chat up.



Do this now, get this on paper, leave the kids to twiddle their thumbs if you must.



Ok, maybe not leave the kids (as per comment) but I'd suggest getting at least a short "hey I have a question I'm very worried about, I'll email once I have time, mind if I drop by in the afternoon?" out of the way. Sociopaths have a tendency to proactively discredit their victims so you need to be ahead of that.






share|improve this answer





















  • 31





    +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

    – Twyxz
    22 hours ago






  • 3





    I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

    – UKMonkey
    18 hours ago






  • 8





    This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

    – Hilmar
    16 hours ago






  • 2





    Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

    – CramerTV
    13 hours ago






  • 1





    Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

    – C Bauer
    11 hours ago





















85














Speak to HR immediately, you signed a blank piece of paper - make sure it stays blank



Normally advice around speaking to HR is "HR are not your friend". However, this is in the context of bringing up general workplace greivances - as HR's remit is to protect the company, not the employees.



In this case, you have a manager who plans to break the law - by forging a document with your signature. This would put your kindergarten in a serious legal problem, especially if that forged document was ever used to terminate your employment. This is exactly the kind of situation HR do not want to happen.



You need to explain to them exactly what has happened (in writing via email, and then in person), and that there is now a blank sheet of paper with your signature, you believe will be used to fraudulently create a signed warning letter.



Importantly, I'd recommend you only focus on the potential misuse of your signature on the blank letter. Anything else, such as personal issues with this manager - will not necessarily be in their interest to help you with (and the usual "HR doesn't love you" advice applies).





For your personal sake; it's worth adding that while it was an extremely stupid move to sign that paper - it is understandable, and abusive managers have managed to push each of us to lower our personal standards at one time or another (so don't worry about how it happened, just get it sorted). Legally, that paper has no value, and you need to remember that you haven't legally given somebody the right to write whatever they want - you have unfortunately just given them the opportunity to break the law.






share|improve this answer



















  • 13





    To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

    – mgarciaisaia
    11 hours ago



















31














Amplifying what the other answers already said: Talking to HR is NOT enough, you MUST file a written report.



Write exactly down what happened with as much detail (time, location, names, quotes) as you can recall. Stick to the facts, don't put any emotion or interpretation into it. Take this report to HR make a copy for yourself. Make HR sign your copy and confirm in writing that they have received the report. Insist that they attach this report to your personell file.



You may want to have this looked over by a lawyer, before you file it.



Make sure you are friendly and co-operative with HR, but also be assertive when they try to push you off or ignore you. I don't think they can legally refuse to accept the report and confirm it's reception (again, a lawyer would help here).



Unfortunately, your blank signature could be a ticking time bomb. HR may try to sweep it under the rug and then it pops up 1 year later as a signed confession to something nasty. At that time, there may be entirely different people in HR. This needs to be documented clearly and you need written proof of it, so you have something to defend yourself with if you need it.



Ideally you get the paper back, but this may not happen. It's possible that your manager will simply deny that this happened. Or she may say "I already threw it away" or "I can't find it at the moment". HR won't be able to do much about this. Hence, you need thorough protection in writing.






share|improve this answer

































    14














    Okay, in matters like this.



    HR IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND



    This manager is dangerous, and likely committing some fraudulent action. I won't scold you about signing a blank anything as you already realize the implications.



    Write down all the events leading up to this, detail the event itself, walk into HR with your account and ask to see any additions to your file since that date.



    The danger is not just to you, but to anyone else that deals with this person. HR needs to be alerted to protect you and any other employees who engage with him/her. This is one of the reasons HR exists, and this is absolutely a matter for them.



    RUN, don't walk to the HR department.






    share|improve this answer































      3














      The prevailing advice seems to be to talk to HR about it and document it there.

      Note that a lot of these same people (on different questions) would probably tell you to not go to HR.



      If the trip to HR does not go to your benefit, I think that you should write out what happened sign it, and get it notarized. That is admissible in court if the words above your signature turn out to be something other than what you were told they would be - and maybe even if they were what you were told that they would be.



      There may also be a police report that you can file - as the intent could be fraud and you felt that you were under duress and had to sign the report. I presume you're under duress or at least stress because you mention how bad an idea it was to do that.






      share|improve this answer



















      • 7





        You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

        – Steve-O
        12 hours ago






      • 1





        @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

        – J. Chris Compton
        12 hours ago






      • 3





        @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

        – Richard U
        10 hours ago



















      1














      There are some notes about going to HR about "potential misconduct" which is part of why I'm taking the time to write this as a separate answer.



      You can not control what your manager does. You can not anticipate what your manager will do. Speculating as to what your manager conceivably might do is a good way to give them an actionable grievance that you've yourself recorded with HR and turn this into a back and forth over something other than what actually happened, which is what you don't want in a situation like this.



      You do need to document this with HR



      But to be clear, you need to document only what you did and why you did it:



      Your manager requested you sign a blank sheet of paper. You signed a blank sheet of paper and gave it to your manager, per their request. [You can repeat what they told you about why they were making that request, but I would avoid getting embroiled in that: ideally keep this as cleanly focused on the basic hard facts as possible, so there's not room for argument later on about who said what.] You didn't think anything of it at the time, and you try to be a good employee who does what they are told [or whatever you'd like to say in that regard of following orders], but for clarification's sake you would now like documented that what you signed was a blank sheet of paper, and that is the only thing you are agreeing to having signed, because THAT is what you signed.



      If a date or something else was requested on it, note that. If it is literally just your signature, note that.



      Don't speculate on what your manager might or might not do with the blank paper you signed. Don't accuse your manager of intending to commit fraud. (if your manager DOES commit fraud, then address it as such: but the key here is do NOT accuse them of something that they haven't actually done yet)



      Do create a paper trail. Email it, BCC a personal account, and request to schedule a discussion or at least a "quick chat" in person with someone regarding making sure it gets properly documented. When you go, make sure you print off a paper copy to take with you so you have a reference of what you sent that you can refer back to if things get stressful, and as a reminder to keep it simply focused on the basic facts of what you did and that it was at the manager's request.



      Don't make a big deal out of it: just be calm yet firm about wanting it documented. If HR (ideally) wants to make a big deal out of it, that's on HR, let them be the ones to press the concern and don't interject it yourself. Keep your own focus on what you did and why, and your expressed concerns related to that specifically, not on what your manager might or might not do. Don't be the one who turns it into a big thing, because other than being an odd and inappropriate request, nothing has happened yet. Don't accuse your manager of anything at this point. If necessary or pressed, you can state that your concern is something very mundane and not specifically related to your manager, like "what if it gets lost and someone else finds it?" but my advice would be to simply keep things straightforward as a matter of just wanting it documented in your record since it was at your manager's request, but that you have no specific concerns and just want an official record of having done so per request.



      If you do this and it turns into something where HR has you sit down across from your manager regarding this, don't try to engage. Don't be the one who asks the manager why they did that. Don't speculate. Just stick to the line that you just wanted what you did per request documented, and that all you did was sign a blank sheet of paper, which is all you agree to having signed, which hopefully everyone can agree is an odd thing to have signed (again, do not speculate about what someone else MIGHT do with such a piece of signed paper, focus only on what you did and that it was per a manager's request/order). Again, if pressed on why you are wanting it documented, stick to your immediate concern over it being strange to sign a blank piece of paper, not what might or might not be done with it.






      share|improve this answer































        0














        I note the most downvoted answers are saying "write it down"... and the most upvoted are saying "to document it, speak verbally with HR". That's backwards.



        Comey that conversation



        "To Comey" is a new verb that means to write down your recollection of events as soon as you can, because you feel there may later be disagreement over what happened. This should be done contemporaneously, or ASAP after the event. For instance, Comey sat in his car right after the meeting and wrote it down on a notepad. This proved very useful later.



        I advise doing more. First, write down your recollection of the meeting. Be truthful and create a recording of the facts that would be difficult to challenge. Second, have it notarized, because you are not James Comey. That proves it was contemporaneous, and you didn't modify your recollection to suit the later situation.



        Third, I would write a courtesy letter capturing in short form your recall of events. Something like this




        Thank you for speaking with me today about the Jan. 3 incident, and hearing my side of events. As I said, I feel this and this and this, and you pointed out this and this and this. I recall we found a middle ground of this and this and this.



        We also agreed that you would write a modified warning letter to that general effect. For expediency, you asked me to sign a blank piece of paper on which that warning letter would be later placed, and I complied. I would like to have a copy of that letter when complete.



        Again, thank you for taking the time to discuss the matter with me. Usual salutation, signature.




        Nothing threatening in there, and they don't know about the notarized note. You wouldn't use that or even announce its existence except to your own lawyer if things go that far.



        Then, go have that verbal conversation with HR.






        share|improve this answer































          -4














          Take notes and write down the chain of events as well as you remember as soon as possible and the time that they happened. I would wait and see what your manager writes in before you take any further action.






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          • 2





            -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

            – Dan Pichelman
            15 hours ago






          • 2





            She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

            – Hans Janssen
            14 hours ago



















          -5














          Calm down, you made a mistake. Unfortunately running in and requesting that paper you signed (which possibly does not even exist -according to her, when challenged) is an issue.



          Several steps.
          1. Remember and write down EVERYTHING about that day. What you where wearing, what she was wearing, the time of day (before lunch, etc). Often times, seemingly irrelevant facts can help to corroborate your story, at the very least someone else may be able to verify these facts and lend weight to your story.




          1. Go back and talk to her about it, noting your discomfort with the whole thing
            YOU MAY BE ABLE TO LEGALLY RECORD THE CONVERSATION DEPENDING ON YOUR STATE/COUNTRY


          https://www.mwl-law.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/LAWS-ON-RECORDING-CONVERSATIONS-CHART.pdf



          You may also try talking to a trusted coworker and ask if they know of anything like this happening to anyone else.



          IF YOU DO PLAN TO RECORD AND YOU HAVE THE LEGAL SAFETY TO DO SO, PRACTICE AND REHEARSE THIS ACT, IDEALLY WITH A FRIEND OR TWO TO ENSURE YOU TAKE A GOOD RECORDING AND YOU DONT SEEM OVERLY SUSPICIOUS DOING IT.



          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND - they will, wherever possible, side with the manager - your acts will be construed as you getting second thoughts after signing the paper.






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          • 12





            Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

            – DonQuiKong
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            What @DonQuiKong said ;)

            – rkeet
            15 hours ago






          • 1





            HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

            – Richard U
            11 hours ago











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          9 Answers
          9






          active

          oldest

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          9 Answers
          9






          active

          oldest

          votes









          active

          oldest

          votes






          active

          oldest

          votes









          111














          Yes you are in danger.



          However, anything your manager does (like printing a new letter over the signature) is fraud, and quite the bad variety too.



          As she was doing what she was doing in the capacity of your manager, this is now the problem of your school/company/district or whatever the organisation is where you work.



          HR is not your friend but in this case they will (or at least should) be your ally. To be a bit safer you could make it sound like you are just asking a question ("(describe in detail what happened), hey what was this about?", that way you get both documentation and can stay on polite footing with HR. I'd reccommend dropping by the office after the email too (if that is not too weird for a teacher in your district/area) just to chat up.



          Do this now, get this on paper, leave the kids to twiddle their thumbs if you must.



          Ok, maybe not leave the kids (as per comment) but I'd suggest getting at least a short "hey I have a question I'm very worried about, I'll email once I have time, mind if I drop by in the afternoon?" out of the way. Sociopaths have a tendency to proactively discredit their victims so you need to be ahead of that.






          share|improve this answer





















          • 31





            +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

            – Twyxz
            22 hours ago






          • 3





            I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

            – UKMonkey
            18 hours ago






          • 8





            This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

            – Hilmar
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

            – CramerTV
            13 hours ago






          • 1





            Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

            – C Bauer
            11 hours ago


















          111














          Yes you are in danger.



          However, anything your manager does (like printing a new letter over the signature) is fraud, and quite the bad variety too.



          As she was doing what she was doing in the capacity of your manager, this is now the problem of your school/company/district or whatever the organisation is where you work.



          HR is not your friend but in this case they will (or at least should) be your ally. To be a bit safer you could make it sound like you are just asking a question ("(describe in detail what happened), hey what was this about?", that way you get both documentation and can stay on polite footing with HR. I'd reccommend dropping by the office after the email too (if that is not too weird for a teacher in your district/area) just to chat up.



          Do this now, get this on paper, leave the kids to twiddle their thumbs if you must.



          Ok, maybe not leave the kids (as per comment) but I'd suggest getting at least a short "hey I have a question I'm very worried about, I'll email once I have time, mind if I drop by in the afternoon?" out of the way. Sociopaths have a tendency to proactively discredit their victims so you need to be ahead of that.






          share|improve this answer





















          • 31





            +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

            – Twyxz
            22 hours ago






          • 3





            I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

            – UKMonkey
            18 hours ago






          • 8





            This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

            – Hilmar
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

            – CramerTV
            13 hours ago






          • 1





            Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

            – C Bauer
            11 hours ago
















          111












          111








          111







          Yes you are in danger.



          However, anything your manager does (like printing a new letter over the signature) is fraud, and quite the bad variety too.



          As she was doing what she was doing in the capacity of your manager, this is now the problem of your school/company/district or whatever the organisation is where you work.



          HR is not your friend but in this case they will (or at least should) be your ally. To be a bit safer you could make it sound like you are just asking a question ("(describe in detail what happened), hey what was this about?", that way you get both documentation and can stay on polite footing with HR. I'd reccommend dropping by the office after the email too (if that is not too weird for a teacher in your district/area) just to chat up.



          Do this now, get this on paper, leave the kids to twiddle their thumbs if you must.



          Ok, maybe not leave the kids (as per comment) but I'd suggest getting at least a short "hey I have a question I'm very worried about, I'll email once I have time, mind if I drop by in the afternoon?" out of the way. Sociopaths have a tendency to proactively discredit their victims so you need to be ahead of that.






          share|improve this answer















          Yes you are in danger.



          However, anything your manager does (like printing a new letter over the signature) is fraud, and quite the bad variety too.



          As she was doing what she was doing in the capacity of your manager, this is now the problem of your school/company/district or whatever the organisation is where you work.



          HR is not your friend but in this case they will (or at least should) be your ally. To be a bit safer you could make it sound like you are just asking a question ("(describe in detail what happened), hey what was this about?", that way you get both documentation and can stay on polite footing with HR. I'd reccommend dropping by the office after the email too (if that is not too weird for a teacher in your district/area) just to chat up.



          Do this now, get this on paper, leave the kids to twiddle their thumbs if you must.



          Ok, maybe not leave the kids (as per comment) but I'd suggest getting at least a short "hey I have a question I'm very worried about, I'll email once I have time, mind if I drop by in the afternoon?" out of the way. Sociopaths have a tendency to proactively discredit their victims so you need to be ahead of that.







          share|improve this answer














          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer








          edited 21 hours ago

























          answered 22 hours ago









          BorghBorgh

          3,3182819




          3,3182819








          • 31





            +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

            – Twyxz
            22 hours ago






          • 3





            I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

            – UKMonkey
            18 hours ago






          • 8





            This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

            – Hilmar
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

            – CramerTV
            13 hours ago






          • 1





            Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

            – C Bauer
            11 hours ago
















          • 31





            +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

            – Twyxz
            22 hours ago






          • 3





            I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

            – UKMonkey
            18 hours ago






          • 8





            This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

            – Hilmar
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

            – CramerTV
            13 hours ago






          • 1





            Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

            – C Bauer
            11 hours ago










          31




          31





          +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

          – Twyxz
          22 hours ago





          +1 - Not so sure about leaving the kids but hey :)

          – Twyxz
          22 hours ago




          3




          3





          I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

          – UKMonkey
          18 hours ago





          I'd leave the kids, to some one else... I'm sure you can find someone to watch them for 30 mins while you get this sorted.

          – UKMonkey
          18 hours ago




          8




          8





          This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

          – Hilmar
          16 hours ago





          This is a good answer, but in addition you really have to get something in writing from HR that confirms the communication. HR sometimes has the tendency to give you a sympathetic ear and then immediately swipe it all under the rug

          – Hilmar
          16 hours ago




          2




          2





          Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

          – CramerTV
          13 hours ago





          Perhaps the teacher's union would be a good ally as well.

          – CramerTV
          13 hours ago




          1




          1





          Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

          – C Bauer
          11 hours ago







          Add to this; you should make sure that HR understands that no document which is not signed with at least one witness present should be considered valid. Boss can just photocopy the document now.

          – C Bauer
          11 hours ago















          85














          Speak to HR immediately, you signed a blank piece of paper - make sure it stays blank



          Normally advice around speaking to HR is "HR are not your friend". However, this is in the context of bringing up general workplace greivances - as HR's remit is to protect the company, not the employees.



          In this case, you have a manager who plans to break the law - by forging a document with your signature. This would put your kindergarten in a serious legal problem, especially if that forged document was ever used to terminate your employment. This is exactly the kind of situation HR do not want to happen.



          You need to explain to them exactly what has happened (in writing via email, and then in person), and that there is now a blank sheet of paper with your signature, you believe will be used to fraudulently create a signed warning letter.



          Importantly, I'd recommend you only focus on the potential misuse of your signature on the blank letter. Anything else, such as personal issues with this manager - will not necessarily be in their interest to help you with (and the usual "HR doesn't love you" advice applies).





          For your personal sake; it's worth adding that while it was an extremely stupid move to sign that paper - it is understandable, and abusive managers have managed to push each of us to lower our personal standards at one time or another (so don't worry about how it happened, just get it sorted). Legally, that paper has no value, and you need to remember that you haven't legally given somebody the right to write whatever they want - you have unfortunately just given them the opportunity to break the law.






          share|improve this answer



















          • 13





            To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

            – mgarciaisaia
            11 hours ago
















          85














          Speak to HR immediately, you signed a blank piece of paper - make sure it stays blank



          Normally advice around speaking to HR is "HR are not your friend". However, this is in the context of bringing up general workplace greivances - as HR's remit is to protect the company, not the employees.



          In this case, you have a manager who plans to break the law - by forging a document with your signature. This would put your kindergarten in a serious legal problem, especially if that forged document was ever used to terminate your employment. This is exactly the kind of situation HR do not want to happen.



          You need to explain to them exactly what has happened (in writing via email, and then in person), and that there is now a blank sheet of paper with your signature, you believe will be used to fraudulently create a signed warning letter.



          Importantly, I'd recommend you only focus on the potential misuse of your signature on the blank letter. Anything else, such as personal issues with this manager - will not necessarily be in their interest to help you with (and the usual "HR doesn't love you" advice applies).





          For your personal sake; it's worth adding that while it was an extremely stupid move to sign that paper - it is understandable, and abusive managers have managed to push each of us to lower our personal standards at one time or another (so don't worry about how it happened, just get it sorted). Legally, that paper has no value, and you need to remember that you haven't legally given somebody the right to write whatever they want - you have unfortunately just given them the opportunity to break the law.






          share|improve this answer



















          • 13





            To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

            – mgarciaisaia
            11 hours ago














          85












          85








          85







          Speak to HR immediately, you signed a blank piece of paper - make sure it stays blank



          Normally advice around speaking to HR is "HR are not your friend". However, this is in the context of bringing up general workplace greivances - as HR's remit is to protect the company, not the employees.



          In this case, you have a manager who plans to break the law - by forging a document with your signature. This would put your kindergarten in a serious legal problem, especially if that forged document was ever used to terminate your employment. This is exactly the kind of situation HR do not want to happen.



          You need to explain to them exactly what has happened (in writing via email, and then in person), and that there is now a blank sheet of paper with your signature, you believe will be used to fraudulently create a signed warning letter.



          Importantly, I'd recommend you only focus on the potential misuse of your signature on the blank letter. Anything else, such as personal issues with this manager - will not necessarily be in their interest to help you with (and the usual "HR doesn't love you" advice applies).





          For your personal sake; it's worth adding that while it was an extremely stupid move to sign that paper - it is understandable, and abusive managers have managed to push each of us to lower our personal standards at one time or another (so don't worry about how it happened, just get it sorted). Legally, that paper has no value, and you need to remember that you haven't legally given somebody the right to write whatever they want - you have unfortunately just given them the opportunity to break the law.






          share|improve this answer













          Speak to HR immediately, you signed a blank piece of paper - make sure it stays blank



          Normally advice around speaking to HR is "HR are not your friend". However, this is in the context of bringing up general workplace greivances - as HR's remit is to protect the company, not the employees.



          In this case, you have a manager who plans to break the law - by forging a document with your signature. This would put your kindergarten in a serious legal problem, especially if that forged document was ever used to terminate your employment. This is exactly the kind of situation HR do not want to happen.



          You need to explain to them exactly what has happened (in writing via email, and then in person), and that there is now a blank sheet of paper with your signature, you believe will be used to fraudulently create a signed warning letter.



          Importantly, I'd recommend you only focus on the potential misuse of your signature on the blank letter. Anything else, such as personal issues with this manager - will not necessarily be in their interest to help you with (and the usual "HR doesn't love you" advice applies).





          For your personal sake; it's worth adding that while it was an extremely stupid move to sign that paper - it is understandable, and abusive managers have managed to push each of us to lower our personal standards at one time or another (so don't worry about how it happened, just get it sorted). Legally, that paper has no value, and you need to remember that you haven't legally given somebody the right to write whatever they want - you have unfortunately just given them the opportunity to break the law.







          share|improve this answer












          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer










          answered 20 hours ago









          BilkokuyaBilkokuya

          2,2142616




          2,2142616








          • 13





            To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

            – mgarciaisaia
            11 hours ago














          • 13





            To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

            – mgarciaisaia
            11 hours ago








          13




          13





          To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

          – mgarciaisaia
          11 hours ago





          To OP: read this last paragraph again. And once more. This is abusive behaviour, and it is not your fault. We all wish you can do better next time, but it's completely understandable that you fell into this. Now go fix it :)

          – mgarciaisaia
          11 hours ago











          31














          Amplifying what the other answers already said: Talking to HR is NOT enough, you MUST file a written report.



          Write exactly down what happened with as much detail (time, location, names, quotes) as you can recall. Stick to the facts, don't put any emotion or interpretation into it. Take this report to HR make a copy for yourself. Make HR sign your copy and confirm in writing that they have received the report. Insist that they attach this report to your personell file.



          You may want to have this looked over by a lawyer, before you file it.



          Make sure you are friendly and co-operative with HR, but also be assertive when they try to push you off or ignore you. I don't think they can legally refuse to accept the report and confirm it's reception (again, a lawyer would help here).



          Unfortunately, your blank signature could be a ticking time bomb. HR may try to sweep it under the rug and then it pops up 1 year later as a signed confession to something nasty. At that time, there may be entirely different people in HR. This needs to be documented clearly and you need written proof of it, so you have something to defend yourself with if you need it.



          Ideally you get the paper back, but this may not happen. It's possible that your manager will simply deny that this happened. Or she may say "I already threw it away" or "I can't find it at the moment". HR won't be able to do much about this. Hence, you need thorough protection in writing.






          share|improve this answer






























            31














            Amplifying what the other answers already said: Talking to HR is NOT enough, you MUST file a written report.



            Write exactly down what happened with as much detail (time, location, names, quotes) as you can recall. Stick to the facts, don't put any emotion or interpretation into it. Take this report to HR make a copy for yourself. Make HR sign your copy and confirm in writing that they have received the report. Insist that they attach this report to your personell file.



            You may want to have this looked over by a lawyer, before you file it.



            Make sure you are friendly and co-operative with HR, but also be assertive when they try to push you off or ignore you. I don't think they can legally refuse to accept the report and confirm it's reception (again, a lawyer would help here).



            Unfortunately, your blank signature could be a ticking time bomb. HR may try to sweep it under the rug and then it pops up 1 year later as a signed confession to something nasty. At that time, there may be entirely different people in HR. This needs to be documented clearly and you need written proof of it, so you have something to defend yourself with if you need it.



            Ideally you get the paper back, but this may not happen. It's possible that your manager will simply deny that this happened. Or she may say "I already threw it away" or "I can't find it at the moment". HR won't be able to do much about this. Hence, you need thorough protection in writing.






            share|improve this answer




























              31












              31








              31







              Amplifying what the other answers already said: Talking to HR is NOT enough, you MUST file a written report.



              Write exactly down what happened with as much detail (time, location, names, quotes) as you can recall. Stick to the facts, don't put any emotion or interpretation into it. Take this report to HR make a copy for yourself. Make HR sign your copy and confirm in writing that they have received the report. Insist that they attach this report to your personell file.



              You may want to have this looked over by a lawyer, before you file it.



              Make sure you are friendly and co-operative with HR, but also be assertive when they try to push you off or ignore you. I don't think they can legally refuse to accept the report and confirm it's reception (again, a lawyer would help here).



              Unfortunately, your blank signature could be a ticking time bomb. HR may try to sweep it under the rug and then it pops up 1 year later as a signed confession to something nasty. At that time, there may be entirely different people in HR. This needs to be documented clearly and you need written proof of it, so you have something to defend yourself with if you need it.



              Ideally you get the paper back, but this may not happen. It's possible that your manager will simply deny that this happened. Or she may say "I already threw it away" or "I can't find it at the moment". HR won't be able to do much about this. Hence, you need thorough protection in writing.






              share|improve this answer















              Amplifying what the other answers already said: Talking to HR is NOT enough, you MUST file a written report.



              Write exactly down what happened with as much detail (time, location, names, quotes) as you can recall. Stick to the facts, don't put any emotion or interpretation into it. Take this report to HR make a copy for yourself. Make HR sign your copy and confirm in writing that they have received the report. Insist that they attach this report to your personell file.



              You may want to have this looked over by a lawyer, before you file it.



              Make sure you are friendly and co-operative with HR, but also be assertive when they try to push you off or ignore you. I don't think they can legally refuse to accept the report and confirm it's reception (again, a lawyer would help here).



              Unfortunately, your blank signature could be a ticking time bomb. HR may try to sweep it under the rug and then it pops up 1 year later as a signed confession to something nasty. At that time, there may be entirely different people in HR. This needs to be documented clearly and you need written proof of it, so you have something to defend yourself with if you need it.



              Ideally you get the paper back, but this may not happen. It's possible that your manager will simply deny that this happened. Or she may say "I already threw it away" or "I can't find it at the moment". HR won't be able to do much about this. Hence, you need thorough protection in writing.







              share|improve this answer














              share|improve this answer



              share|improve this answer








              edited 16 hours ago

























              answered 16 hours ago









              HilmarHilmar

              26.5k66381




              26.5k66381























                  14














                  Okay, in matters like this.



                  HR IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND



                  This manager is dangerous, and likely committing some fraudulent action. I won't scold you about signing a blank anything as you already realize the implications.



                  Write down all the events leading up to this, detail the event itself, walk into HR with your account and ask to see any additions to your file since that date.



                  The danger is not just to you, but to anyone else that deals with this person. HR needs to be alerted to protect you and any other employees who engage with him/her. This is one of the reasons HR exists, and this is absolutely a matter for them.



                  RUN, don't walk to the HR department.






                  share|improve this answer




























                    14














                    Okay, in matters like this.



                    HR IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND



                    This manager is dangerous, and likely committing some fraudulent action. I won't scold you about signing a blank anything as you already realize the implications.



                    Write down all the events leading up to this, detail the event itself, walk into HR with your account and ask to see any additions to your file since that date.



                    The danger is not just to you, but to anyone else that deals with this person. HR needs to be alerted to protect you and any other employees who engage with him/her. This is one of the reasons HR exists, and this is absolutely a matter for them.



                    RUN, don't walk to the HR department.






                    share|improve this answer


























                      14












                      14








                      14







                      Okay, in matters like this.



                      HR IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND



                      This manager is dangerous, and likely committing some fraudulent action. I won't scold you about signing a blank anything as you already realize the implications.



                      Write down all the events leading up to this, detail the event itself, walk into HR with your account and ask to see any additions to your file since that date.



                      The danger is not just to you, but to anyone else that deals with this person. HR needs to be alerted to protect you and any other employees who engage with him/her. This is one of the reasons HR exists, and this is absolutely a matter for them.



                      RUN, don't walk to the HR department.






                      share|improve this answer













                      Okay, in matters like this.



                      HR IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND



                      This manager is dangerous, and likely committing some fraudulent action. I won't scold you about signing a blank anything as you already realize the implications.



                      Write down all the events leading up to this, detail the event itself, walk into HR with your account and ask to see any additions to your file since that date.



                      The danger is not just to you, but to anyone else that deals with this person. HR needs to be alerted to protect you and any other employees who engage with him/her. This is one of the reasons HR exists, and this is absolutely a matter for them.



                      RUN, don't walk to the HR department.







                      share|improve this answer












                      share|improve this answer



                      share|improve this answer










                      answered 16 hours ago









                      Richard URichard U

                      88.9k64227350




                      88.9k64227350























                          3














                          The prevailing advice seems to be to talk to HR about it and document it there.

                          Note that a lot of these same people (on different questions) would probably tell you to not go to HR.



                          If the trip to HR does not go to your benefit, I think that you should write out what happened sign it, and get it notarized. That is admissible in court if the words above your signature turn out to be something other than what you were told they would be - and maybe even if they were what you were told that they would be.



                          There may also be a police report that you can file - as the intent could be fraud and you felt that you were under duress and had to sign the report. I presume you're under duress or at least stress because you mention how bad an idea it was to do that.






                          share|improve this answer



















                          • 7





                            You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                            – Steve-O
                            12 hours ago






                          • 1





                            @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                            – J. Chris Compton
                            12 hours ago






                          • 3





                            @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                            – Richard U
                            10 hours ago
















                          3














                          The prevailing advice seems to be to talk to HR about it and document it there.

                          Note that a lot of these same people (on different questions) would probably tell you to not go to HR.



                          If the trip to HR does not go to your benefit, I think that you should write out what happened sign it, and get it notarized. That is admissible in court if the words above your signature turn out to be something other than what you were told they would be - and maybe even if they were what you were told that they would be.



                          There may also be a police report that you can file - as the intent could be fraud and you felt that you were under duress and had to sign the report. I presume you're under duress or at least stress because you mention how bad an idea it was to do that.






                          share|improve this answer



















                          • 7





                            You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                            – Steve-O
                            12 hours ago






                          • 1





                            @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                            – J. Chris Compton
                            12 hours ago






                          • 3





                            @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                            – Richard U
                            10 hours ago














                          3












                          3








                          3







                          The prevailing advice seems to be to talk to HR about it and document it there.

                          Note that a lot of these same people (on different questions) would probably tell you to not go to HR.



                          If the trip to HR does not go to your benefit, I think that you should write out what happened sign it, and get it notarized. That is admissible in court if the words above your signature turn out to be something other than what you were told they would be - and maybe even if they were what you were told that they would be.



                          There may also be a police report that you can file - as the intent could be fraud and you felt that you were under duress and had to sign the report. I presume you're under duress or at least stress because you mention how bad an idea it was to do that.






                          share|improve this answer













                          The prevailing advice seems to be to talk to HR about it and document it there.

                          Note that a lot of these same people (on different questions) would probably tell you to not go to HR.



                          If the trip to HR does not go to your benefit, I think that you should write out what happened sign it, and get it notarized. That is admissible in court if the words above your signature turn out to be something other than what you were told they would be - and maybe even if they were what you were told that they would be.



                          There may also be a police report that you can file - as the intent could be fraud and you felt that you were under duress and had to sign the report. I presume you're under duress or at least stress because you mention how bad an idea it was to do that.







                          share|improve this answer












                          share|improve this answer



                          share|improve this answer










                          answered 12 hours ago









                          J. Chris ComptonJ. Chris Compton

                          2,817322




                          2,817322








                          • 7





                            You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                            – Steve-O
                            12 hours ago






                          • 1





                            @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                            – J. Chris Compton
                            12 hours ago






                          • 3





                            @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                            – Richard U
                            10 hours ago














                          • 7





                            You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                            – Steve-O
                            12 hours ago






                          • 1





                            @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                            – J. Chris Compton
                            12 hours ago






                          • 3





                            @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                            – Richard U
                            10 hours ago








                          7




                          7





                          You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                          – Steve-O
                          12 hours ago





                          You don't go to HR if you were having drinks after hours with a coworker and they made some racist comments (didn't happen on company time, they don't care); you don't go to HR because that guy in accounting has bad B.O. (it's not illegal to stink - sadly); You absolutely do go to HR when your boss makes you sign a blank piece of paper and promises to write out the contents later. HR exists to protect the company, and this sort of thing could seriously damage the company if it wound up in court. That's the difference here.

                          – Steve-O
                          12 hours ago




                          1




                          1





                          @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                          – J. Chris Compton
                          12 hours ago





                          @Steve-O Yes. I was trying to convey: "many people who would normally tell you to not go to HR are telling you to go to HR. In the event that the trip to HR doesn't go in a useful direction... here's another idea."

                          – J. Chris Compton
                          12 hours ago




                          3




                          3





                          @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                          – Richard U
                          10 hours ago





                          @Steve-O I think the point is that if even those of us who are known for saying "HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND" are saying, "Go to HR", the OP should take it seriously.

                          – Richard U
                          10 hours ago











                          1














                          There are some notes about going to HR about "potential misconduct" which is part of why I'm taking the time to write this as a separate answer.



                          You can not control what your manager does. You can not anticipate what your manager will do. Speculating as to what your manager conceivably might do is a good way to give them an actionable grievance that you've yourself recorded with HR and turn this into a back and forth over something other than what actually happened, which is what you don't want in a situation like this.



                          You do need to document this with HR



                          But to be clear, you need to document only what you did and why you did it:



                          Your manager requested you sign a blank sheet of paper. You signed a blank sheet of paper and gave it to your manager, per their request. [You can repeat what they told you about why they were making that request, but I would avoid getting embroiled in that: ideally keep this as cleanly focused on the basic hard facts as possible, so there's not room for argument later on about who said what.] You didn't think anything of it at the time, and you try to be a good employee who does what they are told [or whatever you'd like to say in that regard of following orders], but for clarification's sake you would now like documented that what you signed was a blank sheet of paper, and that is the only thing you are agreeing to having signed, because THAT is what you signed.



                          If a date or something else was requested on it, note that. If it is literally just your signature, note that.



                          Don't speculate on what your manager might or might not do with the blank paper you signed. Don't accuse your manager of intending to commit fraud. (if your manager DOES commit fraud, then address it as such: but the key here is do NOT accuse them of something that they haven't actually done yet)



                          Do create a paper trail. Email it, BCC a personal account, and request to schedule a discussion or at least a "quick chat" in person with someone regarding making sure it gets properly documented. When you go, make sure you print off a paper copy to take with you so you have a reference of what you sent that you can refer back to if things get stressful, and as a reminder to keep it simply focused on the basic facts of what you did and that it was at the manager's request.



                          Don't make a big deal out of it: just be calm yet firm about wanting it documented. If HR (ideally) wants to make a big deal out of it, that's on HR, let them be the ones to press the concern and don't interject it yourself. Keep your own focus on what you did and why, and your expressed concerns related to that specifically, not on what your manager might or might not do. Don't be the one who turns it into a big thing, because other than being an odd and inappropriate request, nothing has happened yet. Don't accuse your manager of anything at this point. If necessary or pressed, you can state that your concern is something very mundane and not specifically related to your manager, like "what if it gets lost and someone else finds it?" but my advice would be to simply keep things straightforward as a matter of just wanting it documented in your record since it was at your manager's request, but that you have no specific concerns and just want an official record of having done so per request.



                          If you do this and it turns into something where HR has you sit down across from your manager regarding this, don't try to engage. Don't be the one who asks the manager why they did that. Don't speculate. Just stick to the line that you just wanted what you did per request documented, and that all you did was sign a blank sheet of paper, which is all you agree to having signed, which hopefully everyone can agree is an odd thing to have signed (again, do not speculate about what someone else MIGHT do with such a piece of signed paper, focus only on what you did and that it was per a manager's request/order). Again, if pressed on why you are wanting it documented, stick to your immediate concern over it being strange to sign a blank piece of paper, not what might or might not be done with it.






                          share|improve this answer




























                            1














                            There are some notes about going to HR about "potential misconduct" which is part of why I'm taking the time to write this as a separate answer.



                            You can not control what your manager does. You can not anticipate what your manager will do. Speculating as to what your manager conceivably might do is a good way to give them an actionable grievance that you've yourself recorded with HR and turn this into a back and forth over something other than what actually happened, which is what you don't want in a situation like this.



                            You do need to document this with HR



                            But to be clear, you need to document only what you did and why you did it:



                            Your manager requested you sign a blank sheet of paper. You signed a blank sheet of paper and gave it to your manager, per their request. [You can repeat what they told you about why they were making that request, but I would avoid getting embroiled in that: ideally keep this as cleanly focused on the basic hard facts as possible, so there's not room for argument later on about who said what.] You didn't think anything of it at the time, and you try to be a good employee who does what they are told [or whatever you'd like to say in that regard of following orders], but for clarification's sake you would now like documented that what you signed was a blank sheet of paper, and that is the only thing you are agreeing to having signed, because THAT is what you signed.



                            If a date or something else was requested on it, note that. If it is literally just your signature, note that.



                            Don't speculate on what your manager might or might not do with the blank paper you signed. Don't accuse your manager of intending to commit fraud. (if your manager DOES commit fraud, then address it as such: but the key here is do NOT accuse them of something that they haven't actually done yet)



                            Do create a paper trail. Email it, BCC a personal account, and request to schedule a discussion or at least a "quick chat" in person with someone regarding making sure it gets properly documented. When you go, make sure you print off a paper copy to take with you so you have a reference of what you sent that you can refer back to if things get stressful, and as a reminder to keep it simply focused on the basic facts of what you did and that it was at the manager's request.



                            Don't make a big deal out of it: just be calm yet firm about wanting it documented. If HR (ideally) wants to make a big deal out of it, that's on HR, let them be the ones to press the concern and don't interject it yourself. Keep your own focus on what you did and why, and your expressed concerns related to that specifically, not on what your manager might or might not do. Don't be the one who turns it into a big thing, because other than being an odd and inappropriate request, nothing has happened yet. Don't accuse your manager of anything at this point. If necessary or pressed, you can state that your concern is something very mundane and not specifically related to your manager, like "what if it gets lost and someone else finds it?" but my advice would be to simply keep things straightforward as a matter of just wanting it documented in your record since it was at your manager's request, but that you have no specific concerns and just want an official record of having done so per request.



                            If you do this and it turns into something where HR has you sit down across from your manager regarding this, don't try to engage. Don't be the one who asks the manager why they did that. Don't speculate. Just stick to the line that you just wanted what you did per request documented, and that all you did was sign a blank sheet of paper, which is all you agree to having signed, which hopefully everyone can agree is an odd thing to have signed (again, do not speculate about what someone else MIGHT do with such a piece of signed paper, focus only on what you did and that it was per a manager's request/order). Again, if pressed on why you are wanting it documented, stick to your immediate concern over it being strange to sign a blank piece of paper, not what might or might not be done with it.






                            share|improve this answer


























                              1












                              1








                              1







                              There are some notes about going to HR about "potential misconduct" which is part of why I'm taking the time to write this as a separate answer.



                              You can not control what your manager does. You can not anticipate what your manager will do. Speculating as to what your manager conceivably might do is a good way to give them an actionable grievance that you've yourself recorded with HR and turn this into a back and forth over something other than what actually happened, which is what you don't want in a situation like this.



                              You do need to document this with HR



                              But to be clear, you need to document only what you did and why you did it:



                              Your manager requested you sign a blank sheet of paper. You signed a blank sheet of paper and gave it to your manager, per their request. [You can repeat what they told you about why they were making that request, but I would avoid getting embroiled in that: ideally keep this as cleanly focused on the basic hard facts as possible, so there's not room for argument later on about who said what.] You didn't think anything of it at the time, and you try to be a good employee who does what they are told [or whatever you'd like to say in that regard of following orders], but for clarification's sake you would now like documented that what you signed was a blank sheet of paper, and that is the only thing you are agreeing to having signed, because THAT is what you signed.



                              If a date or something else was requested on it, note that. If it is literally just your signature, note that.



                              Don't speculate on what your manager might or might not do with the blank paper you signed. Don't accuse your manager of intending to commit fraud. (if your manager DOES commit fraud, then address it as such: but the key here is do NOT accuse them of something that they haven't actually done yet)



                              Do create a paper trail. Email it, BCC a personal account, and request to schedule a discussion or at least a "quick chat" in person with someone regarding making sure it gets properly documented. When you go, make sure you print off a paper copy to take with you so you have a reference of what you sent that you can refer back to if things get stressful, and as a reminder to keep it simply focused on the basic facts of what you did and that it was at the manager's request.



                              Don't make a big deal out of it: just be calm yet firm about wanting it documented. If HR (ideally) wants to make a big deal out of it, that's on HR, let them be the ones to press the concern and don't interject it yourself. Keep your own focus on what you did and why, and your expressed concerns related to that specifically, not on what your manager might or might not do. Don't be the one who turns it into a big thing, because other than being an odd and inappropriate request, nothing has happened yet. Don't accuse your manager of anything at this point. If necessary or pressed, you can state that your concern is something very mundane and not specifically related to your manager, like "what if it gets lost and someone else finds it?" but my advice would be to simply keep things straightforward as a matter of just wanting it documented in your record since it was at your manager's request, but that you have no specific concerns and just want an official record of having done so per request.



                              If you do this and it turns into something where HR has you sit down across from your manager regarding this, don't try to engage. Don't be the one who asks the manager why they did that. Don't speculate. Just stick to the line that you just wanted what you did per request documented, and that all you did was sign a blank sheet of paper, which is all you agree to having signed, which hopefully everyone can agree is an odd thing to have signed (again, do not speculate about what someone else MIGHT do with such a piece of signed paper, focus only on what you did and that it was per a manager's request/order). Again, if pressed on why you are wanting it documented, stick to your immediate concern over it being strange to sign a blank piece of paper, not what might or might not be done with it.






                              share|improve this answer













                              There are some notes about going to HR about "potential misconduct" which is part of why I'm taking the time to write this as a separate answer.



                              You can not control what your manager does. You can not anticipate what your manager will do. Speculating as to what your manager conceivably might do is a good way to give them an actionable grievance that you've yourself recorded with HR and turn this into a back and forth over something other than what actually happened, which is what you don't want in a situation like this.



                              You do need to document this with HR



                              But to be clear, you need to document only what you did and why you did it:



                              Your manager requested you sign a blank sheet of paper. You signed a blank sheet of paper and gave it to your manager, per their request. [You can repeat what they told you about why they were making that request, but I would avoid getting embroiled in that: ideally keep this as cleanly focused on the basic hard facts as possible, so there's not room for argument later on about who said what.] You didn't think anything of it at the time, and you try to be a good employee who does what they are told [or whatever you'd like to say in that regard of following orders], but for clarification's sake you would now like documented that what you signed was a blank sheet of paper, and that is the only thing you are agreeing to having signed, because THAT is what you signed.



                              If a date or something else was requested on it, note that. If it is literally just your signature, note that.



                              Don't speculate on what your manager might or might not do with the blank paper you signed. Don't accuse your manager of intending to commit fraud. (if your manager DOES commit fraud, then address it as such: but the key here is do NOT accuse them of something that they haven't actually done yet)



                              Do create a paper trail. Email it, BCC a personal account, and request to schedule a discussion or at least a "quick chat" in person with someone regarding making sure it gets properly documented. When you go, make sure you print off a paper copy to take with you so you have a reference of what you sent that you can refer back to if things get stressful, and as a reminder to keep it simply focused on the basic facts of what you did and that it was at the manager's request.



                              Don't make a big deal out of it: just be calm yet firm about wanting it documented. If HR (ideally) wants to make a big deal out of it, that's on HR, let them be the ones to press the concern and don't interject it yourself. Keep your own focus on what you did and why, and your expressed concerns related to that specifically, not on what your manager might or might not do. Don't be the one who turns it into a big thing, because other than being an odd and inappropriate request, nothing has happened yet. Don't accuse your manager of anything at this point. If necessary or pressed, you can state that your concern is something very mundane and not specifically related to your manager, like "what if it gets lost and someone else finds it?" but my advice would be to simply keep things straightforward as a matter of just wanting it documented in your record since it was at your manager's request, but that you have no specific concerns and just want an official record of having done so per request.



                              If you do this and it turns into something where HR has you sit down across from your manager regarding this, don't try to engage. Don't be the one who asks the manager why they did that. Don't speculate. Just stick to the line that you just wanted what you did per request documented, and that all you did was sign a blank sheet of paper, which is all you agree to having signed, which hopefully everyone can agree is an odd thing to have signed (again, do not speculate about what someone else MIGHT do with such a piece of signed paper, focus only on what you did and that it was per a manager's request/order). Again, if pressed on why you are wanting it documented, stick to your immediate concern over it being strange to sign a blank piece of paper, not what might or might not be done with it.







                              share|improve this answer












                              share|improve this answer



                              share|improve this answer










                              answered 9 hours ago









                              taswyntaswyn

                              35716




                              35716























                                  0














                                  I note the most downvoted answers are saying "write it down"... and the most upvoted are saying "to document it, speak verbally with HR". That's backwards.



                                  Comey that conversation



                                  "To Comey" is a new verb that means to write down your recollection of events as soon as you can, because you feel there may later be disagreement over what happened. This should be done contemporaneously, or ASAP after the event. For instance, Comey sat in his car right after the meeting and wrote it down on a notepad. This proved very useful later.



                                  I advise doing more. First, write down your recollection of the meeting. Be truthful and create a recording of the facts that would be difficult to challenge. Second, have it notarized, because you are not James Comey. That proves it was contemporaneous, and you didn't modify your recollection to suit the later situation.



                                  Third, I would write a courtesy letter capturing in short form your recall of events. Something like this




                                  Thank you for speaking with me today about the Jan. 3 incident, and hearing my side of events. As I said, I feel this and this and this, and you pointed out this and this and this. I recall we found a middle ground of this and this and this.



                                  We also agreed that you would write a modified warning letter to that general effect. For expediency, you asked me to sign a blank piece of paper on which that warning letter would be later placed, and I complied. I would like to have a copy of that letter when complete.



                                  Again, thank you for taking the time to discuss the matter with me. Usual salutation, signature.




                                  Nothing threatening in there, and they don't know about the notarized note. You wouldn't use that or even announce its existence except to your own lawyer if things go that far.



                                  Then, go have that verbal conversation with HR.






                                  share|improve this answer




























                                    0














                                    I note the most downvoted answers are saying "write it down"... and the most upvoted are saying "to document it, speak verbally with HR". That's backwards.



                                    Comey that conversation



                                    "To Comey" is a new verb that means to write down your recollection of events as soon as you can, because you feel there may later be disagreement over what happened. This should be done contemporaneously, or ASAP after the event. For instance, Comey sat in his car right after the meeting and wrote it down on a notepad. This proved very useful later.



                                    I advise doing more. First, write down your recollection of the meeting. Be truthful and create a recording of the facts that would be difficult to challenge. Second, have it notarized, because you are not James Comey. That proves it was contemporaneous, and you didn't modify your recollection to suit the later situation.



                                    Third, I would write a courtesy letter capturing in short form your recall of events. Something like this




                                    Thank you for speaking with me today about the Jan. 3 incident, and hearing my side of events. As I said, I feel this and this and this, and you pointed out this and this and this. I recall we found a middle ground of this and this and this.



                                    We also agreed that you would write a modified warning letter to that general effect. For expediency, you asked me to sign a blank piece of paper on which that warning letter would be later placed, and I complied. I would like to have a copy of that letter when complete.



                                    Again, thank you for taking the time to discuss the matter with me. Usual salutation, signature.




                                    Nothing threatening in there, and they don't know about the notarized note. You wouldn't use that or even announce its existence except to your own lawyer if things go that far.



                                    Then, go have that verbal conversation with HR.






                                    share|improve this answer


























                                      0












                                      0








                                      0







                                      I note the most downvoted answers are saying "write it down"... and the most upvoted are saying "to document it, speak verbally with HR". That's backwards.



                                      Comey that conversation



                                      "To Comey" is a new verb that means to write down your recollection of events as soon as you can, because you feel there may later be disagreement over what happened. This should be done contemporaneously, or ASAP after the event. For instance, Comey sat in his car right after the meeting and wrote it down on a notepad. This proved very useful later.



                                      I advise doing more. First, write down your recollection of the meeting. Be truthful and create a recording of the facts that would be difficult to challenge. Second, have it notarized, because you are not James Comey. That proves it was contemporaneous, and you didn't modify your recollection to suit the later situation.



                                      Third, I would write a courtesy letter capturing in short form your recall of events. Something like this




                                      Thank you for speaking with me today about the Jan. 3 incident, and hearing my side of events. As I said, I feel this and this and this, and you pointed out this and this and this. I recall we found a middle ground of this and this and this.



                                      We also agreed that you would write a modified warning letter to that general effect. For expediency, you asked me to sign a blank piece of paper on which that warning letter would be later placed, and I complied. I would like to have a copy of that letter when complete.



                                      Again, thank you for taking the time to discuss the matter with me. Usual salutation, signature.




                                      Nothing threatening in there, and they don't know about the notarized note. You wouldn't use that or even announce its existence except to your own lawyer if things go that far.



                                      Then, go have that verbal conversation with HR.






                                      share|improve this answer













                                      I note the most downvoted answers are saying "write it down"... and the most upvoted are saying "to document it, speak verbally with HR". That's backwards.



                                      Comey that conversation



                                      "To Comey" is a new verb that means to write down your recollection of events as soon as you can, because you feel there may later be disagreement over what happened. This should be done contemporaneously, or ASAP after the event. For instance, Comey sat in his car right after the meeting and wrote it down on a notepad. This proved very useful later.



                                      I advise doing more. First, write down your recollection of the meeting. Be truthful and create a recording of the facts that would be difficult to challenge. Second, have it notarized, because you are not James Comey. That proves it was contemporaneous, and you didn't modify your recollection to suit the later situation.



                                      Third, I would write a courtesy letter capturing in short form your recall of events. Something like this




                                      Thank you for speaking with me today about the Jan. 3 incident, and hearing my side of events. As I said, I feel this and this and this, and you pointed out this and this and this. I recall we found a middle ground of this and this and this.



                                      We also agreed that you would write a modified warning letter to that general effect. For expediency, you asked me to sign a blank piece of paper on which that warning letter would be later placed, and I complied. I would like to have a copy of that letter when complete.



                                      Again, thank you for taking the time to discuss the matter with me. Usual salutation, signature.




                                      Nothing threatening in there, and they don't know about the notarized note. You wouldn't use that or even announce its existence except to your own lawyer if things go that far.



                                      Then, go have that verbal conversation with HR.







                                      share|improve this answer












                                      share|improve this answer



                                      share|improve this answer










                                      answered 8 hours ago









                                      HarperHarper

                                      3,1091514




                                      3,1091514























                                          -4














                                          Take notes and write down the chain of events as well as you remember as soon as possible and the time that they happened. I would wait and see what your manager writes in before you take any further action.






                                          share|improve this answer










                                          New contributor




                                          Tombo is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.
















                                          • 2





                                            -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                            – Dan Pichelman
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                            – Hans Janssen
                                            14 hours ago
















                                          -4














                                          Take notes and write down the chain of events as well as you remember as soon as possible and the time that they happened. I would wait and see what your manager writes in before you take any further action.






                                          share|improve this answer










                                          New contributor




                                          Tombo is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.
















                                          • 2





                                            -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                            – Dan Pichelman
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                            – Hans Janssen
                                            14 hours ago














                                          -4












                                          -4








                                          -4







                                          Take notes and write down the chain of events as well as you remember as soon as possible and the time that they happened. I would wait and see what your manager writes in before you take any further action.






                                          share|improve this answer










                                          New contributor




                                          Tombo is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                                          Take notes and write down the chain of events as well as you remember as soon as possible and the time that they happened. I would wait and see what your manager writes in before you take any further action.







                                          share|improve this answer










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                                          edited 16 hours ago





















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                                          answered 16 hours ago









                                          TomboTombo

                                          1393




                                          1393




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                                          New contributor





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                                          • 2





                                            -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                            – Dan Pichelman
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                            – Hans Janssen
                                            14 hours ago














                                          • 2





                                            -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                            – Dan Pichelman
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                            – Hans Janssen
                                            14 hours ago








                                          2




                                          2





                                          -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                          – Dan Pichelman
                                          15 hours ago





                                          -1 - see @Hilmar's answer A year from now that signed paper could have something far worse than a resignation on it. Passively hoping for the best is not a wise answer.

                                          – Dan Pichelman
                                          15 hours ago




                                          2




                                          2





                                          She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                          – Hans Janssen
                                          14 hours ago





                                          She just sold her house for one dollar. Why wait for the manager to show the contract to the bank before taking action?

                                          – Hans Janssen
                                          14 hours ago











                                          -5














                                          Calm down, you made a mistake. Unfortunately running in and requesting that paper you signed (which possibly does not even exist -according to her, when challenged) is an issue.



                                          Several steps.
                                          1. Remember and write down EVERYTHING about that day. What you where wearing, what she was wearing, the time of day (before lunch, etc). Often times, seemingly irrelevant facts can help to corroborate your story, at the very least someone else may be able to verify these facts and lend weight to your story.




                                          1. Go back and talk to her about it, noting your discomfort with the whole thing
                                            YOU MAY BE ABLE TO LEGALLY RECORD THE CONVERSATION DEPENDING ON YOUR STATE/COUNTRY


                                          https://www.mwl-law.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/LAWS-ON-RECORDING-CONVERSATIONS-CHART.pdf



                                          You may also try talking to a trusted coworker and ask if they know of anything like this happening to anyone else.



                                          IF YOU DO PLAN TO RECORD AND YOU HAVE THE LEGAL SAFETY TO DO SO, PRACTICE AND REHEARSE THIS ACT, IDEALLY WITH A FRIEND OR TWO TO ENSURE YOU TAKE A GOOD RECORDING AND YOU DONT SEEM OVERLY SUSPICIOUS DOING IT.



                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND - they will, wherever possible, side with the manager - your acts will be construed as you getting second thoughts after signing the paper.






                                          share|improve this answer








                                          New contributor




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                                          • 12





                                            Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                            – DonQuiKong
                                            16 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                            – rkeet
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 1





                                            HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                            – Richard U
                                            11 hours ago
















                                          -5














                                          Calm down, you made a mistake. Unfortunately running in and requesting that paper you signed (which possibly does not even exist -according to her, when challenged) is an issue.



                                          Several steps.
                                          1. Remember and write down EVERYTHING about that day. What you where wearing, what she was wearing, the time of day (before lunch, etc). Often times, seemingly irrelevant facts can help to corroborate your story, at the very least someone else may be able to verify these facts and lend weight to your story.




                                          1. Go back and talk to her about it, noting your discomfort with the whole thing
                                            YOU MAY BE ABLE TO LEGALLY RECORD THE CONVERSATION DEPENDING ON YOUR STATE/COUNTRY


                                          https://www.mwl-law.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/LAWS-ON-RECORDING-CONVERSATIONS-CHART.pdf



                                          You may also try talking to a trusted coworker and ask if they know of anything like this happening to anyone else.



                                          IF YOU DO PLAN TO RECORD AND YOU HAVE THE LEGAL SAFETY TO DO SO, PRACTICE AND REHEARSE THIS ACT, IDEALLY WITH A FRIEND OR TWO TO ENSURE YOU TAKE A GOOD RECORDING AND YOU DONT SEEM OVERLY SUSPICIOUS DOING IT.



                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND - they will, wherever possible, side with the manager - your acts will be construed as you getting second thoughts after signing the paper.






                                          share|improve this answer








                                          New contributor




                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.
















                                          • 12





                                            Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                            – DonQuiKong
                                            16 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                            – rkeet
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 1





                                            HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                            – Richard U
                                            11 hours ago














                                          -5












                                          -5








                                          -5







                                          Calm down, you made a mistake. Unfortunately running in and requesting that paper you signed (which possibly does not even exist -according to her, when challenged) is an issue.



                                          Several steps.
                                          1. Remember and write down EVERYTHING about that day. What you where wearing, what she was wearing, the time of day (before lunch, etc). Often times, seemingly irrelevant facts can help to corroborate your story, at the very least someone else may be able to verify these facts and lend weight to your story.




                                          1. Go back and talk to her about it, noting your discomfort with the whole thing
                                            YOU MAY BE ABLE TO LEGALLY RECORD THE CONVERSATION DEPENDING ON YOUR STATE/COUNTRY


                                          https://www.mwl-law.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/LAWS-ON-RECORDING-CONVERSATIONS-CHART.pdf



                                          You may also try talking to a trusted coworker and ask if they know of anything like this happening to anyone else.



                                          IF YOU DO PLAN TO RECORD AND YOU HAVE THE LEGAL SAFETY TO DO SO, PRACTICE AND REHEARSE THIS ACT, IDEALLY WITH A FRIEND OR TWO TO ENSURE YOU TAKE A GOOD RECORDING AND YOU DONT SEEM OVERLY SUSPICIOUS DOING IT.



                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND - they will, wherever possible, side with the manager - your acts will be construed as you getting second thoughts after signing the paper.






                                          share|improve this answer








                                          New contributor




                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.










                                          Calm down, you made a mistake. Unfortunately running in and requesting that paper you signed (which possibly does not even exist -according to her, when challenged) is an issue.



                                          Several steps.
                                          1. Remember and write down EVERYTHING about that day. What you where wearing, what she was wearing, the time of day (before lunch, etc). Often times, seemingly irrelevant facts can help to corroborate your story, at the very least someone else may be able to verify these facts and lend weight to your story.




                                          1. Go back and talk to her about it, noting your discomfort with the whole thing
                                            YOU MAY BE ABLE TO LEGALLY RECORD THE CONVERSATION DEPENDING ON YOUR STATE/COUNTRY


                                          https://www.mwl-law.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/LAWS-ON-RECORDING-CONVERSATIONS-CHART.pdf



                                          You may also try talking to a trusted coworker and ask if they know of anything like this happening to anyone else.



                                          IF YOU DO PLAN TO RECORD AND YOU HAVE THE LEGAL SAFETY TO DO SO, PRACTICE AND REHEARSE THIS ACT, IDEALLY WITH A FRIEND OR TWO TO ENSURE YOU TAKE A GOOD RECORDING AND YOU DONT SEEM OVERLY SUSPICIOUS DOING IT.



                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND - they will, wherever possible, side with the manager - your acts will be construed as you getting second thoughts after signing the paper.







                                          share|improve this answer








                                          New contributor




                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.









                                          share|improve this answer



                                          share|improve this answer






                                          New contributor




                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.









                                          answered 16 hours ago









                                          s fs f

                                          11




                                          11




                                          New contributor




                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.





                                          New contributor





                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.






                                          s f is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                          Check out our Code of Conduct.








                                          • 12





                                            Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                            – DonQuiKong
                                            16 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                            – rkeet
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 1





                                            HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                            – Richard U
                                            11 hours ago














                                          • 12





                                            Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                            – DonQuiKong
                                            16 hours ago






                                          • 2





                                            What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                            – rkeet
                                            15 hours ago






                                          • 1





                                            HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                            – Richard U
                                            11 hours ago








                                          12




                                          12





                                          Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                          – DonQuiKong
                                          16 hours ago





                                          Uhm, there is bold text and stuff here so you don't have to SCREAM AT US USING CAPS. ;-)

                                          – DonQuiKong
                                          16 hours ago




                                          2




                                          2





                                          What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                          – rkeet
                                          15 hours ago





                                          What @DonQuiKong said ;)

                                          – rkeet
                                          15 hours ago




                                          1




                                          1





                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                          – Richard U
                                          11 hours ago





                                          HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND is practically my catch phrase around here. in this case, they are.

                                          – Richard U
                                          11 hours ago










                                          Suzan is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.










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